Why did I stop believing...

in a personal "God"?

1. Reading through "holy books", I understood: "these are NOT the words of a God!"

2. "Holy Books" were more likely to have been written by primitive, ignorant men who were inspired by their desire to control and manipulate, than by primitive ignorant men (supposedly special or blessed in some way) who were inspired by a divine entity.

3. Most of them have been changed over time in any case, so whatever the initial message was is barely there at this point in time. So wtf are people following, with claims of their authenticity?

4. The "First cause" of the universe need not have been "God", or some entity with a form of consciousness.

5. The concept can't even be defined properly to be feasible. The unknown inaccessible supreme entity seems to be a convenient cop-out so people can't expose it as demonstrably false.

6. If a being with a consciousness would allow the most disgusting atrocities to have taken place in its name, then it is not a being I would worship or have any respect for.

7. Having "Faith" as opposed to accepting what one knows and what doesn't, is destructive to the self and to people around the person with "faith".

8. There is a fine line between being imaginative and claiming interaction with and perfect knowledge of the universe and its "Creator".

There are plenty more reasons, including the selfish implications of begging the universe to favor your little needs over those of thousands who starve and die everyday, the randomness of the universe, the lack of uniformity in regard to belief, and the number of belief systems that have existed with no intervention. There are also too many so-called "miracles" being performed by "holy" men from all different faiths, and if every faith claims to be the ONLY TRUE faith, then how the hell do these people all have special powers ordained by "the one true God"?

Such nonsense.

I am a fool.

I just got schooled.

There was no argument to be won or lost. No fight to emerge victorious from or anything, but simply a conversation with an old friend that led me to realize once again how absolutely (joke) incompetent I am.

Relativity is a curse! A very true curse! You will never be much better because "better" itself means there is no "best". "Best" is a lie at best (if you'll pardon the pun ;) ), and only serves the one bearing this deceptive title a few moments of narcissistic glory and happiness before someone else scoops it up and takes it away.

Do I not like to be owned? Of course not. I didn't get owned, but the bigger problem was that the need didn't even arise. I just realized it and knew it before it could even happen. I was owned in the worst way possible... I realized I might not be better.

oooh ze Afterlife!!

If you like to consider the possibility of an Afterlife... then sure. All of us have done that and I'm sure there are people who still do. I still consider all kinds of things all the time.

But if you are firmly CONVINCED that there is an Afterlife, and that you just KNOW there is one because either your heart tells you there is one, or bogus science suggests it, or some religious path tells you there is one... then you're a tad crazy/deluded.

That wasn't meant to be offensive, but it's important to consider the implications of one's thoughts, actions, deeds and/or beliefs. Quite frankly, considering a possibility and musing over it -as opposed to having an unwavering faith- is fine because what would be the point of our imagination if we never thought about all kinds of things? Isn't that what going out of the box is all about?

Yes, it is, and that's where it STOPS. When you can't draw a line between what's imaginary, possible, likely, and actually there, there's a problem. I understand perfectly. I've experienced very vivid hallucinations that had nothing to do with drugs, and have had to filter out the real from the imaginary.

Difficult it was, but it was worth it, because at the end I still walked on with my sanity. I might perhaps seem to be unstable from time to time but that's because I hold a lot of thoughts in my head, and I make the effort because I'm trying to be honest with myself. If you really wanted to LEARN something and not just live by shit you make up or what other people tell you is real with no evidence... then you would too.

hmm Feminism?

"Feminism is a collection of movements aimed at defining, establishing, and defending equal political, economic, and social rights and equal opportunities for women.^[1][2][3] Its concepts overlap with those of women's rights. Feminism is mainly focused on women's issues, but because feminism seeks gender equality, some feminists argue that men's liberation is therefore a necessary part of feminism, and that men are also harmed by sexism and gender roles. Feminists are "person[s] whose beliefs and behavior[s] are based on feminism.""

- Wikipedia

So by that definition... I'd really have no problem being a part of this movement. Ever since I was teeny I always felt infuriated by the bad treatment of women shown in movies representing wars, medieval times, or Religions ( I felt no need to include the word "stupid" because in most cases it can be assumed) and felt the baby activist in me rising to protect womenfolk!

But as years passed I couldn't help but wonder, Why did women just seem so weak and vulnerable?

Then I realized that

- A lot of women are oppressed because they like to be. That was one thing- you can't free a slave who doesn't think he/she is enslaved. It's just the cleverest and neatest trap possible. The social roles and rules have been built for so long that it's nearly impossible to shake off the image. Well, it wouldn't happen in a second, but every person that helps to back up that ancient outdated ideal isn't going to take anyone anywhere.

- We live in a patriarchal society ANYWAY. So now what? Do we make it Matriarchal? Gender-neutral? How the hell do we solve that?

- Men are biologically different from females in that they would probably be hornier than women and crave sex more than women, and be more likely to objectify women than most women would be to do the same. But does this mean we should let it slide as something perfectly acceptable? Perhaps there really would need to be a line, but how far would it go? Where would it start and where would it end?

- Lots of women fuck the feminism label over with their stupid ratty, catty bitch fights. ( lala recent pointless stupid Skepchick bs for example). Credibility goes down the shithole when you become obsessed with every single thing that takes place and use that as an opportunity to shove an accusatory "sexist!" remark down someone else's throat. The whole thing becomes a farce when the movement loses its value.

I just don't go with the label, but I personally would like to see more females being intellectual rather than dumb drama craving bitches who ruin the reputation of women as a whole. I'd like to prove Nietzsche wrong in regard to women not being quite cut-out for the Ubermensh. I'd like to do a lot of things but I generally stand alone in wanting to do them. Why?

Once a Nihilist...

I hate to call myself one, but seeing descriptions like this :


"Nihilism rejects faith in favor of an understanding of causal relationships. Nihilists reject the first pivot mentioned above, where a human sees the universe as somehow convergent upon the human being. In seeking such a view, a nihilist arrives at clarity regarding the relationship of human to universe: we are small components within a far larger and more complex system.


In doing so, nihilists throw away all reasons centered in what a human wants to believe, and instead focus on what it is logical to deduce or induce from the world at large, keeping in mind that humans are but a tiny portion of that world. It is a removal of anthropomorphism, a rejection of solipsism and narcissism, and a militant refusal to let “faith” stand in for understanding." (nihil.org)

But I can never throw a label on myself, and I will definitely not call myself an agnostic. That implies I don't qualify for a Nihilist label either. In any case, I used to believe in a weird abstract form of energy "God" and still had a view that everything was inherently meaningless unless we thought differently. I suppose some of us just weren't meant for labels...

The Lonely Tyrant

Whose existence could be more despicable than that of a Tyrant?
While many of us lust for power and the desire to control others, others who have already gained control over all and have no one to look to at eye level have come to the same conclusion.

A life, where there is not a soul to look to as an equal, is a very lonely one indeed.

Even God would rather not exist if it were given the choice. Doesn't that explain a lot about our deserted world?

The whole world screams with life- too much of it in fact- but the more I see it, the more dead it seems. The spirituality is dead, the bonds between friends are dead, and the connections with those I knew have withered.

The sky in its evening splendor is devastatingly beautiful. But when the nihilist awakens, the beauty resigns itself into nothing more than a splash of empty color strewn around by a bored artist who has lost everything, and lives a monotonous, disconnected life.

"In God's Image"

The very idea that certain "holy" books claim that Man was made "In God's image" goes to show the egocentric nature of man. The anthropomorphic nature of the supreme creator of the entire universe suggests the anthropomorphic nature of its origin (- i.e. MADE BY DUDES).

Believers in all kinds of interesting Gods aren't the worst (at least they are doing some thinking... therein exists a certain level of creativity and originality!), but people who believe that God created man and the universe, in the way described in Genesis clearly are in dire need of a brain transplant.

How could anyone think of these writings as anything but childish and primitive? Humans are indeed fascinating!